{"id":6011,"date":"2015-10-19T22:01:08","date_gmt":"2015-10-20T04:01:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.amyreesanderson.com\/blog\/?p=6011"},"modified":"2015-10-19T22:01:50","modified_gmt":"2015-10-20T04:01:50","slug":"not-my-circus-not-my-monkeys","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.amyreesanderson.com\/blog\/not-my-circus-not-my-monkeys\/","title":{"rendered":"Not My Circus. Not My Monkeys."},"content":{"rendered":"

I don\u2019t know about you, but I have always been what I would call a \u201cfix it\u201d kinda girl. I see a problem, so I fix it. In many ways it is what led me to become successful in my business life, but in my personal life it often led me to getting sucked in to fixing other people\u2019s problems for them.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t get me wrong, I think it is good to be a good friend and helper, but sometimes in the \u201cfixing\u201d we don\u2019t allow other people to learn important life lessons for themselves. In addition, often when we take on their problems we are really sending the message that we don\u2019t think they are capable of doing it themselves, which only serves to put them in a worst spot self-esteem wise than they already were. Fixing can often times equal hurting the other person in the long run because you didn\u2019t allow them to grow and become independent on their own. Before you decide to step in and fix things you really need to stop and ask yourself, \u201cAm I helping this person, or am I crippling them?\u201d<\/p>\n

Another potential downfall of being known as a fixer is that some people will try to take advantage of your willingness to help by dumping all kinds of stress on your plate that really shouldn\u2019t be there, which can end up keeping you from accomplishing your own life goals. It\u2019s important to be on the lookout for for the users and abusers.<\/p>\n

Like I said, there are times that being a fixer can be incredibly helpful in life and it can lead you to amazing successes. And being a fixer for a friend a love one can be an amazing thing to do if it is truly in their best interest to receive that help. But be wary of the times you are getting pulled into situations and drama that you really shouldn\u2019t be a part of. And be careful not to let someone else\u2019s dramas become your emergencies. You have plenty of things to handle just managing your own circus \u2013 don\u2019t take on managing other people\u2019s circuses too.<\/p>\n

The next time you get tempted to step in when you shouldn\u2019t, or shoulder someone else\u2019s drama – stop and speak these words out loud to yourself to make sure they sink in, \u201cNot my circus. Not my monkeys!\u201d Then get back to being the ringmaster of your own life \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n

\"IMG_1378\"<\/a><\/p>\n

~Amy<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I don\u2019t know about you, but I have always been what I would call a \u201cfix it\u201d kinda girl. I see a problem, so I fix it. In many ways it is what led me to become successful in my business life, but in my personal life it often led me to getting sucked in […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":3326,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[3261,1021,174,46,251,7484,536,2568,122,715,7165,6451,7479,7476,33,76,7477,55,7478,3693,2777,1578,38,7480,7473,7482,7471,7472,7483,7475,423,7481,496,519,112,145,7485,6037,7474,149,1248,4132,78,4401],"class_list":["post-6011","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-abuser","tag-amazing","tag-anxiety","tag-attitude","tag-balance","tag-best-interest","tag-business","tag-capable","tag-distractions","tag-drama","tag-emergency","tag-fix-it","tag-fixing","tag-fixing-other-peoples-problems","tag-friend","tag-goals","tag-good-friend","tag-happiness","tag-helper","tag-helpful","tag-independent","tag-interest","tag-leadership","tag-lifelessons","tag-my-monkeys-fly","tag-nonsense","tag-not-my-circus","tag-not-my-monkeys","tag-on-your-plate","tag-personal-life","tag-problem","tag-ringmaster","tag-self-worth","tag-self-esteem","tag-self-improvement","tag-service","tag-shoulder","tag-situations","tag-sterss","tag-success","tag-successful","tag-take-advantage","tag-time","tag-use"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.amyreesanderson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6011","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.amyreesanderson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.amyreesanderson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.amyreesanderson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.amyreesanderson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6011"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.amyreesanderson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6011\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6014,"href":"https:\/\/www.amyreesanderson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6011\/revisions\/6014"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.amyreesanderson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3326"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.amyreesanderson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6011"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.amyreesanderson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6011"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.amyreesanderson.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6011"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}