Amy Rees Anderson

Letting The Men In On A Secret About Women

Valentine’s Day is almost upon us and for those men out there with a significant other in your life this is your friendly reminder to do something special for that love in your life! Because you do NOT want to be that guy who finds himself at the drug store last minute picking from the last few Valentines cards left on the rack…we’ve all seen one of those guys before and it is not a pretty sight.  So now is the time to make sure you have something ready to go for tomorrow!

Here’s a little secret I will let the men in on – What women want is to know that you care. It’s not about the amount of money you spend on us. It’s about putting thought into it and showing us that you pay attention to the little things that matter to us. It’s about noticing when we mention little things such as our favorite treat, or a movie we want to go see, or how we love it when our car is clean and full of gas, or when we let it slip that we miss doing something….it’s hearing those things and noticing them and then doing something about them that is the very best way to show us you care. Because all a girl wants is a man who pays attention to her and lets her know he cares through his actions, not just his words.

Anyone man can buy a girl flowers, but not any man will take the time to really get to know a girl and understand what’s important to her. That takes time and effort and a whole lot of patience on your part men because we women acknowledge (although typically only to each other) that we are difficult to handle. We know we can get overly emotional at times and we know we can even be a bit irrational on rare occasions (…extremely rare occasions… 🙂 ), so it means that much more to us to know that you love us enough to put up with those extremely rare times that we are difficult and that you still care enough to notice what makes us happy.

Men, if you are struggling to think of something meaningful to do after hearing my advice above I suggest this – stop for a second and think back to the last time you saw your wife truly light up. Where was she in that moment, what was going on around her, who was she with, what was being done or discussed that made her smile light up your world? Then figure out how to recreate a little more of that in her life.  For example, maybe it was when she had a quiet moment alone without the kids screaming for her and if so then go get her a gift certificate for an hour at the Spa. Maybe it was when she was going to see a chick flick with her girlfriends so go buy her tickets and this time take her yourself to a chick flick (trust me this one will pay off for you big time after the movie is over…#worthit). Maybe it was when you were helping do the dishes for her one night so get home and do more than just dishes clean up the house for her.  Make sense?

I realize that many people gripe that Valentine’s Day is a big commercial scam to sell roses and chocolates, and maybe that’s true, but isn’t it a good thing that at least once a year someone reminds you to show a little appreciation to the love of your life? Because heaven knows you men can sometimes use a little reminder….just sayin’

I hope all of you have a fantastic Valentine’s Day. And for those who don’t have a special someone in your life right now go out and celebrate Single Awareness Day in its place. Buy yourself something nice because gosh darn it, you deserve it!

~Amy Rees Anderson

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